American Fathers 4Change with a mission of helping to bring awareness that by increasing the proportion of children growing up with involved, responsible, and committed fathers it will improve the well being of children.
"The man as he converses is the lover; silent, he is the husband." ~ Honore de Balzac
Sometimes hostile people will be vindictive enough to file false allegations of child abuse. With this going on the child suffers because the parent only filed false allegations to get the upper hand. Maybe they just want to get even with the other parent, step parent and sometimes other family members. In some cases abuse does occur. But in these cases that many of us have to deal with one of the parents will lie in court about child abuse. Sometimes even sexual child abuse.
The hostile parent will not lie only once but many times because they can get away with it. The court system should make these parents accountable for their bad actions. There should be at least a fine to pay, loss of custody, or even possible jail time.
Lying about abuse isn't okay it's perjury and it's wrong. It's also a form of using the child as a pawn in a selfish game some parents play. The law should uphold the law and keep people accountable when they lie about child abuse and lie in court papers.
Children shouldn't be used as a pawn to hurt others. They shouldn't be caught up in a lie made by their parents. Children should be love and not used.
Just hearing the words child support sparks an emotional response. Fathers who feel like the rules are more about the paycheck than the parenting, mothers who say they cant live on what they have.
Facebook.com/AmericanFathers
In general, the perception is, its unfairly biased against men in the state of Massachusetts, says John Ollen of Marthas Vineyard.
Editor’s note: This article is also available in Romanian.
Erin Pizzey was born in 1939. In 1971 she founded the first nationally and internationally recognized women’s shelter (or “refuge”) in Chiswick, which is part of London in the UK. Her organization expanded to include many houses and a large growing organization, now known as Refuge in the UK.
It was soon after founding her organization that she began being subject to public protests and death threats.
A key figure in the women’s movement of the 1970s, she eventually fled her native England with her children after the protests, threats, and violence culminated in the shooting of her family dog. However, she never stopped her work advocating for victims of domestic violence, and eventually returned to the UK.
Her work continues to this day. She is widely loved.
She is also widely hated.
She is a supporter of the men’s movement, and it is hard not to consider her the first Honeybadger. It was my honor to speak to her in early December 2012. –Dean Esmay
Transcript follows:
Dean: Good morning Erin, how are you?
Erin: Good morning, It’s very cold.
Dean: It’s very cold is it? Well, it’s early December, I guess it is cold; you’re living in London these days, yes?
Erin: Yes I am.
Dean: So, you have recently, in the last year or so, published a book called “This Way to the Revolution – a Memoir” from Peter Owen Publishers. What can you tell me about that book, Erin?
Erin: I’ve always tried to tell the truth about the beginnings. I was one of the first people in England to get involved with the Women’s Movement and what I saw there, I knew perfectly well was going to be extremely destructive. And, when I began to stand up at these great big Collective meetings – and interestingly enough there were a lot of women from America who came over with initial instruction to show the British women how to be radical feminists. They’re a pretty frightening crowd and I got screamed at a lot partly because I said many women like myself, who are married, with or without children are perfectly happy to have the choice to be able to stay home. So, in the end last year actually… it took me ten years to get this book published, it was turned down by every major publisher in this country. And, finally, Peter Owen, who is a fine very small publishing company, agreed that they would publish. And they’ve done a wonderful job of it. And it is, it’s the whole truth about what went on behind the movement… the feminist movement.
Fathers play a critical role in the development of their children. The latest research indicates that fathers who are actively involved in raising their children can make a positive and lasting difference in their lives. In contrast, this same research reveals a number of potentially negative outcomes for children whose fathers are not involved.
1. Lets your child know that you love her. Love involves more than saying the words, “I love you.” Fathers who love their children demonstrate their love by spending quality and quantity time together. Children who feel loved are more likely to develop a strong emotional bond with their father and a healthy self-esteem.
In a culture that has moved beyond “Father Knows Best” and grown weary of Homer Simpson, what does it mean to be a dad? That question is especially salient in a nation where economic and cultural changes have reduced the likelihood that a man is his family’s breadwinner or even living with his children. In the interest of learning more about contemporary fatherhood from the inside, this mother recently dropped by the Dad 2.0 Summit.
Now in its fifth year, Dad 2.0 is the conference where dads meet parenting-related activists, marketers, and the media. Dad 2.016, as they called it, attracted a varied and interesting crowd, with a female minority and a boatload of bearded men.
In all, 450 participants descended on Washington DC to discuss issues of concern to men, both as fathers and as influencers — whether as published writers, filmmakers, or social media stars. They engaged in important, practical discussions about improving video quality and properly tailoring blog content to your audience, but what captivated me was the fatherhood component.
Men’s Singular Approach to Life
As I’ve written before, I enjoy listening to men discuss parenting. Not only does it warm the heart to hear men talk lovingly about their families, but the conversations tend to be much mellower than those women have about motherhood. Perhaps the most fascinating part, from my point of view, is just how differently men talk about parenting (and other things).
Only 7 percent of men can relate to media portrayals of men.
American society has so many negative cultural stereotypes of men, especially as useless, overgrown children. Yet the men I encountered at Dad 2.0 proved how mythical those negative stereotypes are. In an interview, Jen Bremner, brand manager for conference sponsor Dove Men+Care, noted that only 7 percent of men can relate to media portrayals of men. Ninety-two percent of men say it’s their emotional strength that defines them as men.
During one session I sat in on called “Mastering the Moving Image,” the all-dad panel shared helpful hints on improving videos across online platforms, while good-naturedly ribbing one another. I liked one panelist urging an audience member to both fail often and fail in ways unique to him. That struck me as good life advice, but something I couldn’t imagine hearing from a fellow mother in a similar context.
Emotional openness, awareness, and strength were certainly on display all around me. On stage, author Brad Meltzer delivered an opening keynote urging the audience to consider our legacy — to both family and community — and how we want to be remembered after we’re gone. Drag racer Doug Herbert spoke about losing his two sons in a car accident, and how that inspired him to found a special defensive driving school for teenagers.
Elevating Expectations for Men
Out in the audience, I met a life coach who specializes in helping fathers resolve their own work-life balance challenges. Another attendee co-founded a nationwide group to help dads get out and socialize together. A third dad, who stays home raising his young children, asked a former stay-at-home mom moderating a social media session for advice about transitioning back to full-time office work. After a presentation about how biased family courts are against fathers, I watched one man tear up while talking to the speaker, because her remarks had clearly hit a nerve.
These men were reflective. They clearly relished the role of father, and they took it seriously, albeit with a sizable helping of good-natured humor.
‘The Dad 2.0 mission has sought to elevate the conversation and the expectations for men, in a way that benefits the whole family.’
For the summit’s founders, that’s precisely the point. In an interview, Summit co-founder John Pacini commented...
“We’ve recognized that the bar for fatherhood has been set unreasonably low for so long, while at the same time the bar has been set unreasonably high for women and moms. The Dad 2.0 mission has sought to elevate the conversation and the expectations for men, in a way that benefits the whole family.”
That they’ve done. The dads at this conference do more than just show up. They’ve clearly also given significant thought to what it means to be a dad, how to support their spouses, and how to best raise the next generation. They’re redefining fatherhood for the modern era, or in Pacini’s words, demonstrating “masculinity at its best.”
It’s a model that would likely look familiar to Baltimore’s Joe Jones orMemphis’ MeiAngelo Taylor. Both men started fatherhood training programs to help men in their communities who wanted to be involved with their kids but weren’t entirely sure how. As MeiAngelo told me in an interview in 2014, men can provide for their children in many ways, “not only financially, but also spiritually and emotionally.” The dads at Dad 2.0 would undoubtedly agree. In 2016, this is fatherhood.
Photo Andrey Ershov / Shutterstock Melissa Langsam Braunstein, a former U.S. Department of State speechwriter, is a freelance writer in Washington, D.C.
"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision. When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home." (Tecumseh).
American Fathers Liberation: ALL Men’s Rights are Human Rights. ’nuff said http://bit.ly/1JgMgEm
