My testimony to four Florida Judges about the abuses I suffered in Miami-Dade Family Court

 

Overcome the influence that your child gets from the alienator on a daily basis.

Steps To Take To Deal With Your Alienated Children

Dealing With Them When During Visitation/After Reunification.

First of all, let us discuss the more common of the two; the scenario of visitation.

Whether visitation is one day of the week or several, the behavior of an alienated child is most likely to be the same. Children are generally resistant and defiant, and will attempt to diffuse the alienated parent, and will make every attempt to diffuse the visitation. From ill behavior, violence, rudeness, underhanded tack ticks, you can expect anything.

Generally, anything and everything can happen and a parent has to be on their guard. This is no time for cupcakes and ice cream. Young children in the family have to be guarded as well if they are from a second marriage. If I am sounding harsh, I mean to be, I am realistic. I have seen this happen.

Of course, as with everything in life, there are acceptations to every rule.

You may have a perfectly adjusted child who has been alienated from you. If that is the case, ignore everything I have said above.

The problem with children who have been under the influence by an alienator is that they suffer with PAS… Parental Alienation Syndrome. Although it is not a recognized syndrome by the DSM (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th edition text revision (DSM-IV TR is used by clinicians and psychiatrists to diagnose psychiatric illnesses.).

These children are emotionally behind by ten years by the time they are in their teens. Yes, they behave like 6-8 year olds. They may walk, talk and look like their peers, and are 4.0 students like my four children are, but emotionally, they are stunted.

Parents Spend Thousands To Be A Visitor

To (state law maker)

This letter is written because of my concern to our Family Laws and the 60 million dollar business supporting them:

It is my concerns that the laws are causing harm to our children and only help the Lawyers making Thousands in their present form. I understand that the awareness of abuse in the past and that the discrimination against men that they flee from their responsibility of children is the basis that these laws were incorporated, but the facts stated in background listed below shows just the opposite.

Lets deal the facts concerning the first of the incorporation of the understanding of the abuse issue:

The mercury reported in 2014 that “the legal system is not the place to domestic violence in majority of cases. Ploughing more money into prosecutors and creating criminal offenses will not assist in dealing with the root causes of family violence”.

Science Debunks the “women are the gentler sex”, Medical Daily Jan. 30, 2014, in a symposium (June 25, 2013) on intimate partner violence at The British Psycholical Society”s division of forensic Psychology annual conference found women are more likely to be “INTIMATE TERRORIST” or PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE to their partners.

Medical Xpress reported that Dr Elizabeth Bates study of 1000 students revealed that just as many women as men could be classified as abusive, coupled with controlling behavior with SERIOUS levels of threats, intimidation, and physical violence. This study also found that women demonstrated a desire to control their partners (and family, children?) And more likely to use physical aggression then men, ”it wasn’t just pushing and shoving”

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence “men and boys (children) are less likely to report the violence. Sixteen percent of adult males who did report being raped or physically assaulted are victims of current, or former spouse, cohabitation partner. 

Harvard Study 2010, revealed that 70 percent of domestic violence is committed by women against men.

2001 CDC survey of young adult in heterosexual relationships provided answers to violence-related questions Researchers found that women were more likely to insight violence then men.

Australian Institute of Family studies, Australia biggest childhood study reveals found girls are more devious then boys in the torment of their classmates.

All states in the USA, using the case load and statics from child services, Human resources shows that 70 to 75 % of abuse, neglect, and emotional issues are against the Biological mother (CHECK YOUR OWN AREA).Moving to the discrimination thought that fathers do not accept their responsibility:

This idea only hurts the fathers that want to be with and care for their children, fact is that a father who wants his kids in his life WILL HAVE A LIVING ARRANGEMENT THAT ALLOWS THE CHILDREN THEIR OWN ROOMS, WILL BUY SCHOOL CLOTHES AND SUPPLIES, HAS EXTRA FOOD IN HIS HOUSE, PAYS FOR CHILD CARE WHEN HE WORKS, AND HAS ALL THE EXTRA BILLS FOR HAVING CHILDREN. We will discuss this further in child support laws.

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The trauma of waking up without my child

'If you are on your own on Christmas Day, you can't candy-coat the fact that something has gone wrong in your life'

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2250696/Lowri-Turner-The-agony-waking-Christmas-Day-children.html#ixzz3tPAE8gcw
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Usually, come Christmas morning — well, 4am to be precise — I’m woken by the squealing of over-excited children and the tell-tale rip of paper. I can hear every ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’ as my 12, nine and five-year-olds open the sack of presents Father Christmas has left them. 

Last year, the high point was when my five-year-old daughter unwrapped her Barbie pony. It was a toy I’d also had as a child, so seeing her at the side of my bed, clutching it with eyes like saucers, was one of those moments that make all the boring bits of motherhood — the cooking, the cleaning, the battles over homework — worthwhile. 

This year it will be different. There will be no happy squeals, no little feet thundering up and down the hall. No huge, messy pile of wrapping paper. Instead, there will be just me and silence. Oh, and the dog.

That’s because for the first time ever, I will be waking up on Christmas Day without my children. 

The problem is that Christmas makes the difference between the real and ideal so obvious. For example, when you have children, you build up a store of Christmas family traditions, such as playing a particular board game after Christmas dinner. For us, it’s eating chocolate for breakfast in our pyjamas. 

When your children are away, you lose not only them but your little rituals and therefore the whole ‘shape’ of Christmas Day. I did once go away for Christmas without the boys before my daughter was born. I was with my then husband and his family in the West Midlands. 

They were very kind but having a gaggle of children there who were not my own was awful. I managed till 3pm before almost bursting into tears over a ‘family’ game of Cluedo. The lack of my own family was simply too much to bear.  

The most difficult thing about being a divorced parent on Christmas Day is the emotional loss and feeling of failure. As far as I’m concerned, being childless on December 25 feels like having one of those huge comedy hands pointing at you, saying: ‘Sad divorcee.’ 

Every lone parent will testify that there are many occasions when you feel the fact that you are not part of a conventional couple. School plays, parents’ evenings, birthday parties, holidays — all need to be negotiated with care. 

But nothing brings it home as hard as Christmas. It’s the time of year when the imperfections in adult lives are exaggerated. John Lewis might like to consider re-uniting a snowman with his ex-snowwoman and their snowchildren as a poignant Christmas campaign next year. 

I know some post-split parents get over the problem by reuniting for the big day. But what do you do with all the extended families — yours, his, plus potential new partners?


If I assembled my family, both my exes’ families plus my three siblings’ partners’ families, I’d need Wembley Stadium to fit them all in. And that’s if they’d agree to be in the same place at the same time. 

Of course, compared to some I’m lucky. At least I’ll be seeing my children later in the day. But even having them dropped off halfway through has its challenges. There’ll be the hasty handover on the doorstep. The children will rush in, eager to get to a fresh pile of presents, tossing byes over their shoulders as they go.

Their fathers will hover awkwardly as we say Merry Christmas. 

At least once the children are home, I will value them more because I haven’t had them all day. So while their dads and stepmums may be flagging, I will be fresh and delighted to see them.

In the meantime, when I wake on Christmas morning I will try my best to enjoy the quiet — so rare as a mum-of-three. I will eat chocolate in my pyjamas on my own and have my lunch for one with the dog. It’s just a shame she hasn’t learned how to pull a cracker yet…

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