This letter is written because of my concern to our Family Laws and the 60 million dollar business supporting them:
It is my concerns that the laws are causing harm to our children and only help the Lawyers making Thousands in their present form. I understand that the awareness of abuse in the past and that the discrimination against men that they flee from their responsibility of children is the basis that these laws were incorporated, but the facts stated in background listed below shows just the opposite.
Lets deal the facts concerning the first of the incorporation of the understanding of the abuse issue:
The mercury reported in 2014 that “the legal system is not the place to domestic violence in majority of cases. Ploughing more money into prosecutors and creating criminal offenses will not assist in dealing with the root causes of family violence”.
Science Debunks the “women are the gentler sex”, Medical Daily Jan. 30, 2014, in a symposium (June 25, 2013) on intimate partner violence at The British Psycholical Society”s division of forensic Psychology annual conference found women are more likely to be “INTIMATE TERRORIST” or PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE to their partners.
Medical Xpress reported that Dr Elizabeth Bates study of 1000 students revealed that just as many women as men could be classified as abusive, coupled with controlling behavior with SERIOUS levels of threats, intimidation, and physical violence. This study also found that women demonstrated a desire to control their partners (and family, children?) And more likely to use physical aggression then men, ”it wasn’t just pushing and shoving”
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence “men and boys (children) are less likely to report the violence. Sixteen percent of adult males who did report being raped or physically assaulted are victims of current, or former spouse, cohabitation partner.
Harvard Study 2010, revealed that 70 percent of domestic violence is committed by women against men.
2001 CDC survey of young adult in heterosexual relationships provided answers to violence-related questions Researchers found that women were more likely to insight violence then men.
Australian Institute of Family studies, Australia biggest childhood study reveals found girls are more devious then boys in the torment of their classmates.
All states in the USA, using the case load and statics from child services, Human resources shows that 70 to 75 % of abuse, neglect, and emotional issues are against the Biological mother (CHECK YOUR OWN AREA).Moving to the discrimination thought that fathers do not accept their responsibility:
This idea only hurts the fathers that want to be with and care for their children, fact is that a father who wants his kids in his life WILL HAVE A LIVING ARRANGEMENT THAT ALLOWS THE CHILDREN THEIR OWN ROOMS, WILL BUY SCHOOL CLOTHES AND SUPPLIES, HAS EXTRA FOOD IN HIS HOUSE, PAYS FOR CHILD CARE WHEN HE WORKS, AND HAS ALL THE EXTRA BILLS FOR HAVING CHILDREN. We will discuss this further in child support laws.
We all hear horrid tales everyday of families being torn apart by an a failed family system. I understand the many aspects and I believe where it needs to start is to change the labeling. I first saw this story and said wow, then instead of complaining I decide to say something about it. It is starting to catch eyes, everyone please join together to post on this or provide me with info to further peruse this with great integrity and facts. I will provide a link to story in comments... Fathers Equal Rights, Fathers Rights, Fathers Rights, Fathers Unite, Kids Need Parents EquallyFederally funded study ever undertaken on the subject, psychologist Sanford Braver found the "deadbeat dad" who walks out on his family and evades child support "does not exist in significant numbers. Braver found women initiate at least two-thirds of divorces, and that the cause of action is rarely desertion, adultery or violence
Researcher Shere Hite reports that 91 percent of divorces are initiated by wives, And David Chambers claims "the wife is the moving party in divorce actions seven times out of eight
Study of low-income fathers in England found "the most common reason given by the fathers for not having more contact with their children was the mothers' reluctance to let them. . . . Most of the men were proud to be seen as competent care givers and displayed a knowledge of child-care issues
Parental alienation (or Hostile Aggressive Parenting) even though not excepted by the American Psychological Association, is a theory first popularized by Dr. Richard A. Gardner as parental alienation syndrome. Under the theory, parental alienation occurs when a group of parental behaviors are damaging to children's mental and emotional well-being, and can interfere with a relationship of a child and either parent. Many courts and several countries have excepted it’s reality to parent child relationships and more importantly custody issue. THE RULES OF THE COURTS ALREADY, teach the principles of it in parenting classes and meditations, so why would the system not except it as a legal avenue?
Many counties and courts have taken that action and in fact bring charges and high fines against any action in which some person may use any appearance of similar
The 60 million dollar business of family law:
Parents spend Thousands to BECOME A VISITOR TO THEIR KIDS, spend thousands to be falsely accused, spend thousands to be charged 20 to 35 % of their income for child support to misused by other parent, spend thousand to see which lawyer has better tactics and the court ignore the truth because it was not allowed or mistakenly submitted under the rules of the courts, This is not the best interest of the child it is legal maneuvering!
Indian Child Welfare Association, “lawyers who not only attempt to circumvent federal and state laws....”
California Court of Appeals, false allegations, and other misconduct “marred the case by woman’s attorney, two lawyers sanctioned $5000 each (it costed client twice to three time s that amount to hire an attorney).
Journal star Dec. 18 2014, “while not often discussed publicly, the use of children to gain leverage...” “Courts should enforce existing rules that restrict the use of abusive tactics.” “Should amend our legal ethics rules to prohibit lawyers from using children as leverage” “the legal rules should provide that lawyers who are involved in child custody matters owe duties to both their client and TO THE MINOR CHILD” “the legal ethics rules should require special training for lawyers who handle child custody cases.”
Commonly published dirty tactics listed by multiple attorneys and news articles: Misusing ex-parte hearings for non-emergency situations to gain a tactical advantage Repeating client’s lies even though the attorney should know something is amiss (unless of course he or she does not know they are lies, in which case perhaps the attorney is more careless and/or stupid than unethical), Lying in court about information known first-hand to attorney Discriminating against Pro Per (self-represented) opponents by refusing to communicate via means typically used with other attorneys, Acting as if he or she doesn’t know the rules, possibly to cover for his
For her client’s misdeeds or himself or herself breaking the rules, Stating that he or she has not seen documents that were personally served on the attorney plenty of time before a hearing, Lying to court clerks, claiming he or she was not properly noticed a hearing and then refusing to attend (angie media, elusive justice.wordpress, etc.)
Now that I have discussed the Basis and factual information of why the common sense of why these laws were falsely enacted by law makers of the past, Let us discuss present day reality of Family court, the 60 million Dollar industry of child custody and what is in the best interest of our children.
Let me start with the above issue of child support, the truth is that no matter who gets primary custody or secondary custody both have the EXTRA cost of having children. Both parents have to pay rent, both parents have utility bills it does not matter if there are children involved or not! Both parents buy items for their kids, both have child care during their time of custody (which should be a support system, friend, family to courts not cash flow), both have to buy extra food, and unless that parent wants CHILD SERVICES involved in their life both have to have a bigger residence then if they lived alone. Both parents have to have a reliable transportation to even enforce that time of custody. So under that COMMON SENSE logic the idea of child support does not justify itself! Now lets look at the above stats which are so low or are the result of ALIENATION the idea of support is again not justified. Continuing on this issue
because of the listed “extras” that the secondary parent incurs the law of chid support actually cause more harm to the child and substandard environment to child then the spirit of the law tries to accomplish, that many of these secondary custody parents do not have reliable transportation, work two jobs to cover the extra cost of VISITING their children, are not able to be there for their children because of the threat of jail (and for those not caring don’t care about jail anyway). The system of support should be family, friends, social groups, or religious groups IT SHOULD NOT BE BASED ON CASH FLOW, I agree that insurance, medical bills, and school and/or education are and should be determined by the courts if parents can not work it out but the fight of custody should not be a consideration in the CASH FLOW of the other parent. IF ONE PARENT CAN NOT AFFORD PRIMARY CUSTODY ON THEIR OWN, THEY SHOULD HAVE THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD IN MIND AND LET OTHER PARENT HAVE PRIMARY CUSTODY!
The past laws of primary and secondary custody are out dated, it was based on living locations and the many of the false assumptions listed above. Today many public school systems now have home school or online courses and/or programs. Extra curriculum activities are even being cut in schools and being swept up in the private sector due to budgeting.
The laws of old did not account for the studies of, A majority of prisoners, juvenile detention inmates, high school dropouts, pregnant teenagers, adolescent murderers and rapists all come from fatherless homes. Researchers have found that "The likelihood that a young male will engage in criminal activity doubles if he is raised without a father and triples if he lives in a neighborhood with a high concentration of single-parent families. An estimated 70 percent of the juveniles in state reform institutions, 72 percent of adolescent murderers, and 60 percent of America's rapists grew up without fathers. The connection of social pathologies with fatherless homes is so strong that some researchers have concluded that the likelihood of children's
involvement in crime is determined by the extent of both parents' involvement in their children's lives, rather than income or race. These studies would only conclude that equal parenting far out weights any conception that there is and/or should be a primary or secondary custody issue.
There are many opponents to equal parenting, research has shown that most of these are lobbyist (usually backed by attorneys) or attorneys themself because it would interfere with their cash cow! There is no professional that can show that equal parenting is not in the best interest of the child! All the above studies and research proves that no government official should not support equal parenting if they really have the interest of their community in mind.
I contend that equal parenting would in fact give our children a more expanded social environment and social skills then restricting them to a single environment view and that visiting one parent actually hinders the child since that child can never make any lasting or long term friendships. This should made retroactive to any custody order that has already being ordered under the “standard custody” or better in courts so as to limit any excessive case loads already in the courts.
So in closing I believe as a elected official that your office should consider the enclosed information, and that proper laws should be made to properly protect our children. That you should work with other officials and create retroactive laws so that lawyers can not use the children of our community as cash cows and stop the anger that our children are placed in because of out dated and falsely assumed facts.
1) make equal parenting the priority goal of the custody issue of courts
2) end unfair child support, stop making the custody of children a matter of support
3) make laws for the financial responsibility of custody for insurance, government repayment (if on assistance), medical bills, and school and or education ...ONLY
4) take the custody of our children away from anyone trying to make a profit with these law changes, and prosecute with stronger penalties for any lawyer and/or person raising or making false accusations IN A CUSTODY MATTER, not even asking for any family matter.
5) make tougher laws for anyone that interfere with custody for more then twice the travel time it would take to make the trip between the two custody custodians and to make such interference if not a felony on first violation at least a felony on the second violation
6) end child support and make the state departments that handle it now a government reimbursement unit to help tax payers get back funds from those not trying to support their families
7) make laws retroactive to any standard order of custody
8) stop lobbyist from imput when it comes to custody of our children and letting lawyers use custody issues as their cash cow.